Bananarchy

Dear Bananarchists,

Welcome to the end of another season. After debating for a while about what to do this year for the Grand Hibernation Party, we finally decided to try out doing an open mic night. Now, I know what you are thinking. “I’ve heard that one before! Last time you were going to have an open mic night it poured down raining! Which is clearly a sign that it was never meant to be!” First of all, I’d like to commend you for being such a loyal bananarchist that you remember that lonely night two years ago, even though you probably weren’t coming. Second of all, I’d like to suggest that you start thinking a bit more positively. But whether you do or not, the fact remains that this Saturday is:

OPEN MIC NIGHT (v1.5)!!!

Sign up sheet available at the event. The time slots will be 15 minutes long, starting at 7:30 p.m. Original music only.

We anticipate it being kind of a chill night. Come with your listening ears and bring a blanket, since the picnic tables have emigrated. Also, the weather might be cool.

We will be closing at midnight on Saturday (but the open mic will close at 10). Then we will be closed on Sunday, as we usually are. Our last day of the season will be Monday, October 31, with the season’s closure at 10 p.m.

Thank you and good night.

P.S. RSVP on Facebook here!

P.P.S. Also, feel free to wear COSTUMES!!!

This Saturday (10/22) is the second annual Gypsy Picnic Trailer Food Festival! And guess what? That’s right – we’ll be there!

Location: Auditorium Shores
Time: 11 a.m. to 8 p.m.

Some other people will be there, too. And some bands and stuff.

We will be serving:
-Chocolate with peanuts**
-Peanut butter with chocolate chip cookies
-Chocolate with toffee**
-Vegan chocolate with Oreos*

For more information, see the Gypsy Picnic website, or our really educational blog entry from last year explaining the basic concept of the Gypsy Picnic in the form of an NYABPSBQ (Not Yet Asked But Probably Should Be Questions).

Keep in mind that this also means that we will NOT be at our normal location on Saturday, October 22. So plan accordingly.

We will also be CLOSED Friday, October 21 because of load-in for the picnic.

*Vegan
**Gluten-free

Bananarchists,

We thought we had best address the news from a few days ago, in case any of you is conflicted on how to fit this event into your understanding of bananarchism.  Just so you know, our official position is that we do not support violent means of achieving banana freedom.  We encourage all of you to go home and sorrowfully consider the damage this banana man has done to the bananarchist cause, while simultaneously remembering that bananas totally pwn. Feel free to comment if you would like to have a dialogue about it.

Good news for you, Bananarchists!  In response to popular demand, we are extending our hours (starting today)!

Our new hours are:

Monday-Thursday – 12 p.m. to 10 p.m.

Friday-Saturday – 12 p.m. to midnight.  (Technically midnight takes place on the day following each of those days, but you get the idea.)

We hope this will be an if-you-build-it-they-will-come scenario, or if-you-extend-it-they-will-come-in-this-case scenario, especially since so many of you have asked for this.

Happy May 23!

Dear Children,

As you probably know, April 30 is a very special day. Not only is it May Eve, and not only is it Willie Nelson’s 78th birthday, and not only is it also the birthday of my best friend from fourth grade, and not only is it the feast day of Quirinius of Neuss, who was decapitated (not to be confused with Publius Sulpicius Quirinius, former governor of Syria), but also–it is the day on which there will be an EVENT of much interest.

What I mean is, we are having LIVE MUSIC! And not just any live music, but some really great bands! Here is the lineup:

- THE VAGUENESS.
- FIRE DRINKS GRASS.
- DESCENDANTS OF ERDRICK.

If you have been very good about coming to our events, you may recall the last two bands from the Bananarchy Awareness Party last year, and Fire Drinks Grass from a couple additional events.

Also:
We would like to take this time to extend a welcome to Búfalo Bob’s Chalupa Wagon, which is brand SPANKIN’ new, right out of the mobile vending BOX, and located right next to us. He serves bison meat! And vegan/vegetarian options! Please buy and eat chalupas at the same time in which you are eating frozen bananas. RSVP on Facebook here. And have a nice day.

xoxo,
Bananarchy

Dear Bananarchists,

As we mentioned in our previous post, we will be stumbling out of hibernation on Monday, March 14 (which is very soon!).  We’ll be at our same location from last year, 600 S. Lamar, in the parking lot of what is now Toastie’s Sub Shop.  Our hours, at least for now, will remain Monday through Saturday from 12-9.

ALSO:

On Saturday, March 19, we be hosting the South by South Banana Kickoff Party from 5-10pm at our location.  Hooray!!

This will feature LIVE MUSIC by the following talented people:

• Alex Rhodes
• Valentiger
• Bangups

ALSO FEATURED WILL BE CONOR OBERST IN A BANANA SUIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*

During this time, we will give you $0.50 off your frozen banana if you can complete this phrase: “There’s always _______ in the banana stand.”

We know how much you like live music, especially during SXSW, so we expect you to be there with bells on.  And we do mean literal bells.  Don’t come with metaphorical bells and expect that to be good enough.

So come to the kickoff!  And RSVP on Facebook here!

xoxo,

Bananarchy

*This is not true.

Good morning, Bananarchists!

We would like to thank you for remaining faithful during these harsh winter months.  We received an unprecedented number of winter phone calls from people looking for us that were at once frightening (because we had to disappoint a lot of people) and flattering.

As a reward for your faithfulness, we have decided to reopen on Monday, March 14 in honor of SXSW, Pi Day, and the death of Balto.  (Please do not interpret this to mean that we approve of the edible kind of pies in any normal form, nor that we are celebrating Balto’s death.)

We will be reopening at our same location from last year, 600 S. Lamar.  Thanks for your continued support!

Ho, Bananarchists,

As mentioned in a previous post, we will be participating in the Gypsy Picnic this coming Saturday!  This is your real last chance to get frozen bananas this year, unless you go to extraordinary lengths.  Come support us from 11 a.m. to 8 p.m. at Auditorium Shores!  And vote for us for all the contest stuff, because I hear we can get prizes or something.  And who doesn’t want that.  Question mark.

Since some of you probably don’t know what the Gypsy Picnic is, we have prepared a preemptive FAQ, or NYABPSBQ (Not Yet Asked But Probably Should Be Questions), for you.  Here it is:

Q: What is the Gypsy Picnic?

A: It is an Austin trailer food festival in its first year, to be celebrated this Saturday, November 6, at Auditorium Shores.

Q: What time is it at?

A: As you might be able to guess from the beginning of this post, the event goes from 11 a.m. until 8 p.m.

Q: How much does it cost to get in?  I am a poor and lowly!  All I have is this drum!

A: Never fear!  It is free entry!  However, you will need some money if you want to buy anything.  Maybe you could play your drum on the street corner for a few hours…?

Q: Will there be real Gypsies there??

A: We do not discriminate, and neither do the festival putters-together, and we hope to see people of every tribe, tongue, and nation at the Gypsy Picnic.  We especially hope that our friends the Romani people will send representatives to sample our vittles.  This way we will taste in a small portion some of the honor we lay at their feet by vending at this festival in their honor.

Q: Will the Gipsy Kings be playing?

A: Not that we know of.  But some other bands will be.

Q: Will Sufjan Stevens be playing?

A: Now you are being ridiculous.

Q: What other mobile vendors will be there?

A: How can you even ask such a question??

Q: I want to pay with a credit card!!

A: Well, that’s nice.  But bring cash anyway.  Also, that was not a question.

Q: Will you have your full menu?

A: Unfortunately, we’ve been compelled to limit it.  But we will still have several regular menu options as well as vegan options.

Q: How will my attendance further the Bananarchist cause?

A: By coming out and supporting us, and voting for us for stuff, you will be helping to educate the public about the validity of the frozen banana as a dessert, which may eventually lead them away from the evil doctrines of Cakeism and Ice Creamism and to the noble and glorious doctrines of Bananarchism.

Make your own t-shirt! Bring a light-colored t-shirt to the Grand Hibernation Party (Saturday) and spray paint the Bananarchy logo on it for $4!  (We have black spray paint only.)

Winter Survival Kits! On Saturday, October 30, we will be selling winter survival kits for those of you heartbroken about our impending absence.

$10 kit: includes a half Afternoon Delight, chocolate Cookie Crumble, and chocolate with nuts.

$16 kit: includes a half Afternoon Delight, chocolate Cookie Crumble, chocolate with nuts, Milly Vanilly, and peanut butter with Oreos.

Don’t let your family go without potassium this winter!

It’s that time of year again.  The time of year where we close for the winter for the second time, and you all have to suffer for months devoid of warmth and frozen bananas.  It is like the sailor stranded on the sea after a shipwreck who, surrounded by the ocean, still has no water to drink.  There you will be, surrounded by the cold of winter, and also probably surrounded by bananas, but without that thing your heart most craves: frozen bananas of Eternal Joy.  And all this simply because it is Not Banana Weather.

I hope this teaches you perseverance, but I also hope that you take advantage of your last opportunity to eat our frozen bananas before the winter.  (Well, second-to-last, but I’ll get to that in a minute.)  The GRAND HIBERNATION PARTY.  Come celebrate with us on our last day of the season.  There will be:

• LIVE MUSIC.  Provided by Fire Drinks Grass.
• A GIANT BANANA.  That gives free hugs.
• COSTUMES.  Provided by us, you, etc.
• LOVE.  Naturally.
• FROZEN BANANAS. Almost as naturally.

The event begins at 7:30pm and goes until around 10:30.  Please RSVP on Facebook here!

We will additionally be bananning the stand at Auditorium Shores on November 6 for the Gypsy Picnic.  More on that to come.